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« Word of the Ass | Home | Tiffany's "Page Six" »

Apocalypse Now

Part of: Politics

* This is a May entry from my old blog, but it's time appropriate. I am going to a screening of Elf, so if I die in the next few hours, I will die laughing.

[*Edit--I made it through Elf, though I did almost die from laughing. I loved it...go see it]


We are at the highest terror alert. I used to get anxiety over this news. Now I am blasé.

I have water and canned tuna. I also have water in my car-- though I might get cancer from drinking it. You shouldn’t drink from heated plastic bottles or cans.

I’ve been having a decent amount of sex. [?] I could go solo for a while. Maybe I should buy a vibe. [?]

I could hang in my womblike apartment for 5 days—no problem. I have lots of books, magazines, and candles. I could (?) switch on my fireplace for additional coziness.

I have alcohol and a cornucopia of pills. Wait, I am missing those.[have more pills now] I could do yoga and get a yoga high. I could meditate.

I could figure out my entire cell-phone functions. What about catching up with my friends in New York and Chicago?

I could write a will and/or novel.

I could use all of my Bed, Bath and Beyond bags to seal my windows. That would be a great way to recycle them!

I could hone my entrepreneurial skills and design a first aid kit for people in different states and cities (only US).

If I needed to skip town, I know two people with boats. Mexico would be nice this time of year. I could pack lightly.

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