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My Life Revolves Around KCRW/ LA Radio

Part of:

FAVORITE NEW CANDY/HEALTH FOOD: black & white almond M&M's

I try to be at home working on my computer, writing, or cleaning when KCRW’s “Morning Become Eclectic" (89.9 FM with Nic Harcourt) comes on from 9 - 12 AM weekdays. Being in my car is okay too—if I’m driving relatively far away. I’m more likely to be in my car 12 PM - 1 PM for KROQ’s (106.7 FM) flashback lunch (mostly 80’s music). On a perfect day, I’ll catch most of “Morning Becomes Eclectic,” then be running errands and driving to appointments between noon and one.

To this day, I crack up whenever I hear “White Lines,” because I clearly remember being in grade school singing it. Duran Duran and Adam Ant have a special place in my heart.

EXT. SCHOOL PLAYGROUND—NOON

The playground is packed with KIDS. TIFFANY (8) is playing hopscotch with her best friend’s CHEYENNE, MELANIE and TINA. Just as CHEYENNE is about to throw her marker, TIFFANY belts out:

TIFFANY
Free rock, free rock, free rock, free rock
Ah, ah, ah, ah
White ooo white, white ooo white,ooo white ooo

CHEYENNE, startled, drops her marker and forfeits her turn. [Yeah, we were anal about rules]

CHEYENNE pushes TIFFANY so that she falls and scrapes her knee through her white tights.

TIFFFANY is crying now, but doesn’t miss a beat singing.

TIFFANY
WHITE LIES!!!!

FADE OUT

I also remember a girl named Rainbow saying, “You know, I would give John Taylor from Duran Duran a blowjob.”

Cheyenne and I were pretty shocked upon hearing this news. I secretly promised myself never to do that blowjob thing.

Rainbow went on, “Would you rather have sex with John Taylor or Adam Ant?”

I was dangling off the monkey bars by my legs. Rainbow was hanging by her feet, in a dress, with her underwear showing.

That was a hard one. I had to conjure John and Adam up again.

After a minute of debating I said, “I’m not sure….”

John Taylor was prettier.

Rainbow yelled, “I’d have sex with both of them!”

I am brimming with 1980’s music memories.

At night on KCRW we have Jason Bentley for “Metropolis" from 7:30 - 10 PM, then comes Garth Trinidad with “Chocolate City.” They both have really sexy voices.

I remember my old friend Wendy and I used to be at events where Bentley was djing, and we were always trying to figure out if he was gay or straight.

One time, at CMJ, I ran into him with one of my friend’s and he said, “Nice nose ring.”

Recently I met Garth Trinidad at a benefit. He is as sexy as his voice is. I believe I turned red.

The DJ I can’t stand is Liza Richardson from “The Drop.” I know you’re thinking it’s because she’s a girl, but it’s not. Perhaps I have an unreasonable dislike for her because she was in an IBook ad a year or two ago. It didn’t help her indie cred, though I realize it was good publicity for her.

Anyway, this dislike has continued, because I hate her radio voice. You know how when you’re really young and you tried to do a sexy voice? (Hell, I still do that.) Well, Liza does that in a really forced breathy way.

It makes me want to smack her. And why is her radio show called “The Drop?” Maybe it’s a cool music reference that eludes me, but it’s still very annoying.

Lastly, Anne Lit reigns over “Weekend Becomes Eclectic.” She plays great music and has a normal “cute chick’s voice”. She speaks clearly and annunciates well.

I was once at dinner with a group of people including Anne, and she said, “I sound like an art director on air.” I think she’s right.

R.I.P. 103.1 FM’s Groove Radio, which has gone from dance music to indie rock. They gay boys, straight guys (check out Franklin Avenue’s music posts) and Tiffany’s of the world are quite sad. My actress friend who practically drives for a living is seriously mourning this loss.

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