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America's Next Top Role Model

Part of:

[Breakfast: apricot yogurt with Muesli]

I caught the first episode of this season’s "America’s Next Top Model" last night. I never noticed before that Tyra Banks is tres arrogant and bitchy. Though I didn’t watch "America’s Next Top Model" last season, it’s clear she’s evolved to the level of a deity--with real breasts. Tyra called one aspiring model with big eyebrows "Groucho". She told another girl, who was only 10-15 pounds short of being model skinny, that she would be a perfect plus size model. WTF? This seemed a bit hypocritical coming from self–described Bootylicious herself. Perhaps the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance should be harassing Tyra for possibly inspiring a new generation of girls with eating disorders, instead of VILIFYING Vogue’s Andre Leon Talley for saying that Anna Wintour doesn’t like fat people. A lot of young girls see Tyra as a role model. In fact, Tyra founded a free camp for teenage girls in 1999 called T-ZONE. The camp’s WEBSITE states:

In the fan mail she [Tyra] receives from young girls, Tyra sees disturbing patterns of self-doubt, insecure body image, and peer pressures that are hard for girls to resist.

Tyra, Tyra, I think that you’ve gotten a little too caught up in your own celebrity. Perhaps it’s time to step down as a role model before you do more damage. Shame on you. But I suppose that now you’ve got your own TV talk show, you need all those screwed up gals, otherwise no show, right?

On a lighter note, I forgot that "Arrested Development" was on Monday night. Now I’m going to have to bribe someone to get me a copy of it. This is only significant because I like very few shows on TV. I partially prepped DK for "Nip/Tuck’s" third season debut Tuesday night by watching the first season with him. The premiere was an hour and a half long, which I had originally been psyched about. Soon it became obvious that half an hour of that time was allotted for previews of Sony movies (Why not Fox?). I guess this is the new trend in advertising - have one particular company buy all the media space and barrage the viewer with their product…by the end of the experience, I thought I was watching Sony TV and the commercial break was "Nip/Tuck". But it gets worse. Shows like "The Apprentice" are now no more than hour-long commercials for the companies sponsoring the challenges – even Tivo can’t help us there. Damn you, Donald.

I could’ve lived with Sony TV had the season premiere of "Nip/Tuck" been any good but that was not to be. The show started out with a beyond long funeral dream sequence-- this was worrying. More padding was added by dragging on the drama from the surgery client du jour, an obese woman who had literally not gotten off her couch for three years. Boring - although I heard that Tyra showed the episode to the models on "America's Next Top Model" to make them all throw up. Rhona Mitra made her debut as detective Kit McGraw. DK and I got so sick of her talking in a monotone voice that we were making fun of her by the end of the episode. Sure "Nip/Tuck" was soapy last season, but this season seems too over the top already. The episode ended with a menage a trois between Christian, his girlfriend Kelly, and Kit. DK and I were even laughing at the cheesy dialogue between Christian and Kit long before the end. I will watch the next episode, but the outlook for the season is not good.

Now "Nip/Tuck" meets "America's Next Top Model", that's a show I'd watch. I'll write the pitch over the weekend. Tyra, you wanna star?

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